We have all been guilty of saying dumb lies to save ourselves. It is only later that we realize how bad the lie was. Ironically, we would praise ourselves for thinking about something so innovative. With a calm mind later, we understand how much of a fool we appear. Sometimes, lies can be funny in retrospect. But the line blurs if your lie actually hurts someone. Here, we have a few dumb lies that could be classified as harmless enough. All credits go to the Reddit thread specifically created for people to share their stories.

Have You said These Dumb Lies Too?

1. A Hazardous Caution

“My husband’s dad told him that the hazard light button was the ‘self-destruct button’ of the car. The first time he saw the hazard lights turned on, it terrified him.” –

2. Who Had The Last Sip?

“My stepdad always drank this vegetable juice so he could lose weight, but for years he told us it was blood and always tried to get us to have a sip, we would cry almost every time he tried to get us to have a sip. I believed this for years until I actually bothered to read the bottle and realized it was just vegetable juice.”

3. Is This Blasphemous?

“A few thousand years ago, a group of lunatics in the desert decided that there was a Big Man in the Sky that wanted them to k**l any person who didn’t agree with them about the exact qualities of The Big Man in the Sky. Over the years they came to also believe that The Big Man in the Sky would send you to burn for all eternity if you mast**bated, but was perfectly fine with slavery. Unfortunately, many people still believe this lie.”

4. Valiant Try

“In high school, a student asked why the American soldiers in WWII got the nickname doughboy. I said because when they were in France they would visit the French women and love the French bread so much they kept coming back. This is also why we have the Pillsbury doughboy. This explanation was quickly shot down by my teacher but for just a moment I had them.”

5. The Present Isn’t Everything

“‘Live life at the moment.’ High school and college loved to teach us that Carpe Diem stuff. Like, no bud, reflect on the past, dream, and plan for the future.”

6. Sounds Like A Dodgy Sequel

“‘If South Vietnam falls, next week the whole world will be Commies’ And its sequel: Vietnam War 2: Middle Eastern Boogaloo.”

7. The Wrong Kind Of Santa

“When I was around 4, my older brother told me that since we were in a house with no chimney, we had to leave the door unlocked for Santa to get in on Christmas Eve. We forgot and were robbed a month later.”

8. Maybe Gramps Is Someone Special

“My grandpa used to tell me that story where he went hunting one day and, as he was focused on hunting, a snake ate his leg. Then he cut her open from head to tail in a rage attack but felt guilty after a while and sewed her together again. She ran away and his leg grew back sometime later. Why I believed that I have no clue.”

9. The Range Is Actually Quite Large

“I heard this one a couple of times when I was a kid: “God is so precise in his designs that if the earth was a few inches closer or farther away from the sun we’d burn down or freeze.’”

10. The Sad State Of The World

“A government providing financial aid to citizens in need (even during global health and economic crisis) is a form of Communism and should never even be considered. To be clear, I never believed this, but many others do.”

11. Espionage

“In middle school, the rumor was that I was a Russian spy. Literally, everyone believed it and ignored me for the next month, since they don’t want to leak information about themselves to Russia.”

12. Grandpa Sure Knew A Lot

“My grandpa told me this story of those signs that warn for falling rocks on the road. He said a Native American chief put them up in an attempt to find his estranged son named Falling Rock. Every time I saw those signs I would look for him, only to be told years later that he made the whole thing up. Man, I was a dumb kid.”

So, what about you? What are the dumb lies that you are most proud of?

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